Recently, I had a conversation with a friend about booking a trip to Montenegro. I was debating the financial soundness of going on the trip. She was shocked, ‘You? I’ve never heard you second guess going away! If you’re questioning the appropriateness of travel, what chance do the rest of us have?’
Yes, I, the most ardent believer in the huge benefits of travel, had a moment where I questioned my decision to go away. Unsurprisingly, the root of my indecision lay in my finances. As a newly minted member of the locum doctors association (not a real organisation), I am in the position where I do not get paid when I go on holiday. I hadn’t realised how much I had taken for granted the freedom to go away for up to 6 weeks a year, with no financial penalty. Now, I am acutely aware of the cost of each day I am not at work. (Any of my fellow locum workers who feel my pain but have cracked this, please let me know what you did).
So, this article really is for my benefit. A reminder to me that there is always value in travel, whatever one’s circumstances. You too may find it useful.
There are many reasons why everyone should go travelling and there are billions of blog articles that delineate every reason under the sun – to gain new experiences, discover and appreciate new cultures and cuisines, to relax and unwind, take a break from the routine, for adventure etc.
In my opinion, they all omit the profound reason everyone should go travelling …because you are never going to regret it.
There are so many things we do in our lives that fill us with shame or regret – eating a whole packet of cookies after dinner (that’s me, always me), painting your living room an awful shade of puce, those harsh words said to a friend or partner, staying in a bad relationship or dead end job longer than you should have…the list goes on.
However, I have never come across anyone who has regretted travelling.
That is not to say there aren’t some downsides to travelling (look out for my article on this, next week) but the experience as a whole is something no one ever regrets.
Why would you, when travel enriches our lives and our world in so many ways? It expands our horizon, helps us discover ourselves (our strengths, our abilities, and our limitations). It builds our confidence in ourselves and helps us grow. It is scientifically proven to make us happier, and it helps us appreciate what we have.
The personal growth I experienced during my year of travelling is unquantifiable. I am a pretty amazing person (if I do say so myself) and I have been made even better by my travels. I am learning to be more understanding of others and to stop enforcing my rigid ideas, beliefs, and codes of behaviours on them – such as my perfectionistic expectations of others.
I had not realised how much that had impacted on my relationships. Actually, that’s untrue. I was well aware of the impact it was having on my relationships, but I expected everyone else to ‘do better’.
It led to the breakdown of a 16-year friendship, with one of my closest friends. I was going through a difficult time after a family bereavement and I felt that my friend didn’t show up for me in the way that I had always shown up for her. It wasn’t until months later that I let her know how disappointed I was at her lack of support. She apologised profusely but at that point, I had checked out of the friendship.
While in Ecuador, I struck up a conversation, and a friendship, with a German- Lithuanian girl. It was one of those meetings where within the hour we were telling each other our deepest darkest secrets- at breakfast, over some of the most delicious strawberry jam I’ve ever had. She had arrived in Ecuador a year earlier, with the intention of traveling for a couple of months but had fallen in love with the country and so quit her job in Germany and proceeded to live in Ecuador! Anyway, she talked to me about the truly difficult family relationships she’d navigated and displayed a level of compassion and forgiveness in her approach to life that was inspiring. Those stories stayed with me, and over time, caused me to reflect on how I had behaved towards my friend. Ultimately I knew I had to forgive her, and also forgive myself for not living up to my expectation to be better.
I’m in a different place now. I understand that we are all trying to lead the best lives that we can. We don’t always get it right. We don’t always show up as the best versions of ourselves. We let people down. And that’s ok, we are human after all.
This is always easier said than done and I still struggle with this. I have to remember to choose to have a positive approach and grateful attitude everyday. Progress, not perfection.
Going travelling can be a life-changing experience and it certainly is an experience that you won’t regret.
So go out there, take those trips, make memories that you will cherish for all of your days and let it change you in ways you cannot begin to imagine.
Spoiler alert: I did book that trip to Montenegro, and I cannot wait to see some of what that country holds. Look out for my Montenegro blog post in June.